Category Archives: Journal

BEFORE BUILDING ON THE NEW FOUNDATION

You know, it’s easy to walk on the earth as our foundation, it’s a human experience. Yet the problem is that this foundation is becoming obsolete, growing old, and about to disappear. About to disappear is very important to emphasize, that biblical reference indicates that no matter how I build on this obsolete foundation—such as a new house or vehicle, etc.—the foundation is compromised, and so everything built thereupon will also be compromised… growing old… to disappear.

Don’t let that discourage you. After all, everything that came from the dust of the ground on which we walk will return to the dust of the ground; that is, until, God provided mankind with the new foundation!

But see, I know a guy, and gal, personally, that do not believe in the preaching of this “new foundation” let-alone to build upon it. So before I proceed to build on this new foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, or straw, the new foundation must first be laid. This is where the apostle Paul comes in, because by the grace of God given him as a wise master builder, he laid the foundation we gentiles are building upon.

Check it out!

“According to the grace of God which was given to me, like a wise master builder I laid a foundation, and another is building on it. But each person must be careful how he builds on it. For no one can lay a foundation other than the one which is laid, which is Jesus Christ.”—1 Corinthians 3:10-11

Now, I imagine the foundation that the apostle Paul mentioned to have laid, is in reference to where the Holy Spirit had sent him to lay that foundation of Jesus Christ. Why do I think that? Because the apostle Paul is an apostle sent to the gentiles!

Check it out!

“But I am speaking to you who are Gentiles. Therefore insofar as I am an apostle of Gentiles, I magnify my ministry if somehow I may move my own people to jealousy and save some of them. For if their rejection proves to be the reconciliation of the world, what will their acceptance be but life from the dead?”—Romans 11:13-15

However, there were certain places where the apostle Paul was not permitted to lay that new foundation; They passed through the Phrygian and Galatian region, after being forbidden by the Holy Spirit to speak the word in Asia; and after they came to Mysia, they were trying to go into Bithynia, and the Spirit of Jesus did not allow them; and passing by Mysia, they went down to Troas—Acts 16:6-8.

So there is an immediate question that prompts “Why?” In my mind.

And whether this answer is of the Holy Spirit, I’m not sure, but in my experience of evangelism there are times when I desire to share the gospel, yet my tongue remains in the language of the world; the tongue is silenced to the gospel even though the desire to share remains; yet also, at the same time, the tongue moves with grace about politics, entertainment, and the like. This, I believe, is an evidence to the governance of God that is way above the human—including the apostles’—pay grade. That is especially encouraging to know when feeling some form of guilt for thinking not to have the courage to share, which…that may or may not be true; only the Holy Spirit can help us discern those circumstances in relation to the spiritual condition of ourselves.

In light of what we’ve discovered thus far, I’m encouraged to press on in attempt to share the Word…while attentive to the Holy Spirit’s movement. If I detect that the Spirit of Jesus does not allow me to share the Word, then there must be a reason beyond my understanding that I have to trust and live with, and that’s okay.

NOTE: HEBREWS 11:1 & PSALM 90:17

This will always be a good place for me to refer back to when at an impasse on a project. These verses are awesome; on one hand to remind me of where my hope is – as my other hand holds the knife to sacrifice the most precious value that would separate me from God. So as I climb the mountain of literature to offer nothing but faith in the nature of God’s good power to judge my providence, I hope for …a ram caught in the thicket by his horns… while simultaneously prepared to sacrifice what I love most dear … because I trust in Jesus Christ.

1 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

17 And let the beauty of the Lord our God be upon us: and establish thou the work of our hands upon us; yea, the work of our hands establish thou it.

From what I think I can tell by my experience of faith, is that it’s an action of spiritual transaction between me and the God of all creation; that transaction being conducted at the cross of Christ as a perpetual justification by conversion from enemy to reconciliation through Jesus—the Son of God. So now—after a 2000 year history of Christianity’s development—at this juncture—of those of us alive today—in the new covenant I have with God, the work of my hands are of a different nature and equipped to serve the KING of KINGS during my stay on earth.

So, of course, writing, on a public platform, is one of many mediums I hope to bridge between the old foundation of self that abides under wrath to the new foundation of self that escapes wrath for salvation in Jesus Christ.

My job, then, is to lay the new foundation which has already been laid at the cross of Jesus Christ for the unconverted to witness as their means to call on the name of Jesus Christ so as to be saved. Even if not a single person calls on the name of Jesus Christ by this work, my responsibility is to have fought the good fight, finish the course, and kept the faith! So here we go! Lets go Nathan! Remember this! Refer back to this post and keep going, keep pressing on with those who are of a faith as the same kind as the saints of old!

NOTE: SORTING IT OUT

I’m sorting out how to proceed from where I left off.

That impasse of “Presenting The Gospel” with Robert Govett over the meaning of ‘justification’ has me checked, so my next move for that project won’t be ready for however long, but I’m still working it out.

So how to proceed from here?

I’ve had the idea of writing fiction work because of the creativity it inspires, not necessarily bound by the conviction of truth nonfiction work—I feel—cuffs me with, as it should, but there is a fear and anxiety experienced when processing through nonfiction material. I think the fear and anxiety stems out of prophetic possibilities—all that might go wrong by how the future handles my work. But then that stifles my progress… I’ll just have sort that out.

I guess where I can start, and quite possibly will always start once at an impasse; Hebrews 11:1 and Psalm 90:17 are my favorite bible verses. I’ll start there.

NOTE: I MUST KEEP WRITING

I’ve reached a point in posting consistently that a “side stitch” phenomenon is telling me to stop posting.

But I know that if I stop posting I won’t develop a well-organized, efficient mind — and one that is well-founded and certain, as Jordan Peterson wrote in his Essay_Writing_Guide (p. 3), and the reason I won’t develop that is because ‘posting’ means ‘writing’. I must. keep. writing!

I didn’t exactly meet my deadline that I was shooting for this morning, not because I hadn’t been writing, but because of the subject matter of what I was writing. From last night into this morning I was preparing my next post on Presenting The Gospel 101, but as I was preparing hit a contention that I need resolved before I move forward on that particular project—which gets me very frustrated because of the amount of time and effort put into something I thought was ready. I must. keep. writing!

Although this experience is frustrating, I’m thankful it happened or I wouldn’t grow, that’s the beauty to these experiences: growth! If I didn’t sit down to think through what I’m writing, waiting on the Spirit to move me along on the subject matter at hand, I might’ve made a serious mistake.

The nature of my contention is on the subject of justification—from a theological perspective. I’m experiencing conviction by the view Robert Govett has in his track (THE BEST MODE OF PRESENTING THE GOSPEL) about Rom. 5:18 – So then, as through one offense the result was condemnation to all mankind, so also through one act of righteousness the result was justification of life to all mankind. By which, Govett’s view to justification of life to all mankind is *…”upon” believers only.—R. Govett p. 10 (THE BEST MODE OF PRESENTING THE GOSPEL). And now to write out my conviction about that.

The conviction I have does not mean, necessarily, that I disagree with R. Govett as he explains that justification to mean what persuades man, as active and free, the option to come to Christ for salvation. Or in his words… “Evidence then has been laid before the reader sufficient to prove, that the work of Jesus has a universal aspect. That work is presented to man as a being active and free; and motives of every class are brought to bear to induce him, if possible, to seek that salvation which Jesus bestows on all who come to Him.”—R. Govett p. 10 (THE BEST MODE OF PRESENTING THE GOSPEL).

However, my understanding of justification of life to all mankind is presently different in that all mankind whether believer or unbeliever is justified by the righteous act of Jesus Christ, meaning that everyone is justified to appear before God whether saved “wheat” to be entered into the kingdom of God or judged “chaff” to be thrown into the lake of fire.

I’m of the understanding that justification is the very means by which all are resurrected to an immortal life, whether it be immortal in the kingdom of God or immortal in the lake of fire; without justification in Christ the unbelievers wouldn’t be resurrected, but annihilated, which contradicts in two ways, (1) R. Govett’s work on Eternal Suffering, and (2) the Word of God in Revelation 20.

In order for all mankind to be resurrected—whether to salvation or judgment—all must be justified, and by the righteous act of Christ all are justified, whether it be as saved (believer) to eternal life or as judged (unbeliever) to eternal punishment.

That’s my contention…

I must. keep. writing!

Journal Entry 10

And they said to him, “Where is He?” He *said, “I do not know.” They *brought the man who was previously blind to the Pharisees.

John 9:12-13

PRAYER

I pray, Lord, as each of your ‘seeing’ people are brought to testify of your work, will be strong and courageous. To the glory of your name, Jesus Christ. Amen.


If we’ve repented to God and have faith in Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of our sins, we’re on a new foundation! There is much on our subject of a new foundation that I look forward to build upon—in hope that my building will survive the test of fire. Lets see where our new foundations leads us in the days to come.

Journal Entry 9

So they were saying to him, “How then were your eyes opened?” He answered, “The man who is called Jesus made mud, and spread it on my eyes, and said to me, ‘Go to Siloam and wash’; so I went away and washed, and I received sight.”

John 9:10-11

PRAYER

I pray our neighbors will have hearts’ genuine to the answers you’ve provided by sending the Holy Spirit to reveal the nature of your Word that makes our eyes see the miracle that you are; you’re seated at the right hand of the throne of God. I pray we are faithful in communicating the testimony of your work in us and the world. Please help us not use our ability through grace to see the world as an opportunity to sin by wrong motives and ideas, but for righteousness in serving the cause of your good news. In your Name, Jesus Christ. Amen.


DEATH

But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die. (Genesis 2:17)

The nature of death is quite difficult for me to contend with, not because of fear, or…at least, the fact it will happen in its finality one day, but rather because the experience of impending death distracts from its twofold nature—the nature of its physical process and spiritual process. So while the experience of death has a physical hold on me due the condemnation of man; how I choose to die is of another nature to death entirely. Observe…

When you open your bible and turn to 1 Corinthians 15:51-58, what does it say?

Or how about when you turn to Revelation 20:13-15, what does it read?

The two biblical passages—of which there are more—presented, reveal two realities about death, at least, from my perspective. There is (1) a biological reality and (2) a spiritual reality of death. Lets proceed to understand the biological reality…

BIOLOGICAL REALITY

I don’t think it requires much explanation for understanding our biological experience of death, but the fact of its experience, is what is of interest to me, because the law of conservation of energy states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed – but can only be converted from one form of energy to another—of which, admittedly, am totally uneducated about. The only way that that makes sense to me as a human being of energy is that an eternal God (Father) [energy] exists outside our reality and is emitted as God (Son) [energy] inside our reality for emitting [energy] God (Holy Spirit)—LOGOS—to an eternal reality. It doesn’t make sense that life would randomly come into being only to evolve to death, intelligently—”the end”. How does that make any sense to anyone?

I can testify that I experience pain in the process of death, and that communicates something beyond the scientific resolve—it’s not a biological issue. Yes, biology is the study of life, the living, so how is death biological when the very definition contradicts. Death is not biological, it’s a consequence.

I can hear you smart people… “Don’t give me that! That’s not the definition!” Nonsense! I googled the study of death, and you’re correct, it’s the study of thanatology, but the point is… It’s a thanatological (Is that even a word?…) process of a biological reality (… It is a word! Yeahhh… I’m a stewpid smart person!!!). And that means the energy of death is a process of elimination; it will eventually conclude it’s purpose (converting into another form of consequence); whereas, the energy of biology will transcend (converting into another form of experience); we can see that, especially, in our Revelation 20:13-15 passage. That brings us to the second reality of deaths’ nature.

SPIRITUAL REALITY

Since our Lord, Jesus Christ, is the propitiation of our sins, but not ours only, the entire worlds (1 John 2:2). We now have the spiritual reality to die a different death given by the Holy Spirit of God to help in our time of need. We can choose to die a death in faith by believing in Jesus Christ, entrusting Him with our soul by the Word of God. That may sound simple, but the discipline of change is not pleasant nor the process easy.

When death converts into another form, the reality will be—figuratively and literally—Hell (lake of fire). Death and Hades will be thrown into the lake of fire, the lake of fire is the second death (Revelation 20:13-15). That is a spiritual truth from a biblical God, and one not to be taken lightly as we see the world taking it. The consequence for neglecting the discipline of the Holy Spirit’s work in sanctification that saves and seals the believing soul is…a spiritual reality and of eternal significance.

If anyone reading this comes short of the fear of the Lord, then I pray you’ll consider this another plea for your souls’ salvation. I pray you’ll turn your mind and heart off to the world and “die” (For whoever wants to save his life will lose it; but…) for the sake of Christ the Lord (…whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.), our gift of salvation; Jesus, is the Savior of those in the world who might believe (John 3:16-20). Do not wait for the days where you will wish you could die, but cannot:

And in those days shall men seek death, and shall not find it; and shall desire to die, and death shall flee from them.

Revelation 9:6

Journal Entry 8

Some said, This is he: others said, He is like him: but he said, I am he.

John 9:9

PRAYER

Thank you Jesus Christ, for sending the Helper— The Holy Spirit that sanctifies us not only to see, but to be changed! I pray, Lord, that those who look upon us as the work of your hands will marvel at what you are doing in the people who believe. Amen.


UNBELIEF

What is the nature of unbelief?

The serpent said to the woman, “You certainly will not die! For God knows that on the day you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will become like God, knowing good and evil.” (Genesis 3:4-5)

To extract truth from the Word of God for generating lie, is the, idea. That is what I understand the serpent did with the woman, and once that idea-seed germinated, we can see what happened to her perception about the meaning of truth; the consequence by her shift in perception suppressed the truth she knew for a “new” and “improved” “truth” generated by the word of a serpent. The Word of God became suppressed for the “Word” of that serpent that generated the woman’s unbelief for the serpent’s idea and plan to commence.

When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took some of its fruit and ate; and she also gave some to her husband with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves waist coverings. (Genesis 3:6-7)

Until tomorrow…

Journal Entry 7

So the neighbors, and those who previously saw him as a beggar, were saying, “Is this not the one who used to sit and beg?”

John 9:8

PRAYER

Lord, I pray our neighbors recognize the time of our blind begging for the purpose of receiving your grace to see. Thank you for grace and faith to hope in you, Jesus Christ, for the day we’ll see your face. Amen.


SIN


To find yourself in a place with a choice – Independent will or dependent will? Which would you choose and why? How that choice is answered, I believe, reveals the nature of sin.

To have a mind with the capacity to know good and evil is to have a heart for independent will, but is an independent will of good… or evil… ? If by the grace of God my work to the outline of biblical passages presented above proves worthy, then, I believe, the reader will discover that independent will is in fact… evil. That reality of such inspiration cannot be created by man, because to be holy inspired, is to be sanctified from what—independent will—prevented revelation by inspiration of dependent will. But dependent upon who’s will goes beyond our quantum reality into the above; where the divine nature of Christ is seated. And it is there, that our faith takes us, if indeed, our faith is in Jesus Christ.

The scripture verse’s that I think prove the case for a person exercising dependent will to be of ‘good’ are these, saying, “Father, if You are willing, remove this cup from Me; yet not My will, but Yours be done.” and again, He went away again a second time and prayed, saying, “My Father, if this cup cannot pass away unless I drink from it, Your will be done.” (Matthew 26:42; Luke 22:42).

Lucifer was created a divine (anointed cherub) being that was perfect until unrighteousness was found, and the gospel reveals the psychology that distinguishes Christ from the Antichrist, or Jesus Christ from Lucifer; the difference being, …yet not My will, but Yours… against …I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north: I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High (Isaiah 14:13-14). Sin… is of a will independent of God.

Until tomorrow…

Journal Entry 6

When He had said this, He spit on the ground, and made mud from the saliva, and applied the mud to his eyes, and said to him, “Go, wash in the pool of Siloam” (which is translated, Sent). So he left and washed, and came back seeing. 

John 9:6-7

PRAYER

I pray we come back seeing, Lord. Amen.


INQUIRY

So then what is the biblical nature of each path and their interconnected significance? And, Who is Jesus?

Okay *interlock fingers and crack knuckles* …pause… Let me get some coffee for this *gets up from seated position, proceeds to coffee maker with haste, dumps enough coffee in filter to kill a small horse* LETS DO THI— …pause… *laughs it off* Get focused; alright, here we go!

While my coffee is brewing, Lord, please grace me/us with the power and glory of You, for understanding the will of God in our lives. Thank you Father, in Jesus Christ; amen.

Figure 1

To understand the interconnected web in our figure 1 image, we first need to understand the biblical nature of each path.

LEARNING

  • REWARD
  • SIN
  • BELIEF
  • UNBELIEF
  • DEATH
REWARD
Figure 2

The biblical nature of reward revealed by the Holy Spirit (John 14:26; 16:7,13), from my perspective, is as follows. *Coffee now at hand* …Rejoice on that day and jump for joy, for behold, your reward is great in heaven… (Luke 6:23). Jesus taught of reward in heaven by our faithful endurance against the hate of the world… Blessed are you when the people hate you, and when they exclude you, and insult you, and scorn your name as evil, on account of the Son of Man… (Luke 6:23). Which then begs the question. Am I hated by the world? Are you hated by the world? Being hated by the world is a tangible evidence to those blessed by God (which we’ll talk more about in future posts Lord willing), their reward is great in heaven. But lets back up to the first part of that phrase, Rejoice on that day… Why does Jesus say “…on that day” and not ‘today’ or ‘tomorrow’? What does Jesus mean by “day“? What is a ‘day’ to God?

[Lets see how studied we are in the Word of God; you’ll have an idea—or quite possibly know exactly—where I’m about to go by the Holy Spirit revealing His presence in you, assuring you of whether we’re on the right path; if you’re not someone studied in the Word of God, but are hungry and thirsty for learning righteousness, that appetite is the Holy Spirit serving your soul with spiritual food for growth and maturity, examine this with trusted believers; if you’re someone resisting the Spirit of Truth in the Word of God—presented in the passages of scripture following—then please consider softening your heart to the knowledge of the truth, seek the Lord at His Word and His people the Church, because God loves you.]

There are several passages to consider (Psalm 90:4; Ecclesiastes 6:6; 2 Peter 3:8; Revelation 20:2-7), but look at what the apostle Peter writes regarding the meaning of a “day” to God:

But, beloved, be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day is with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day.

—Cephas (Peter)

Peter instructs us …be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day is with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day (2 Peter 3:8). So when we look back to what Jesus said—Rejoice on that day…—we can see that the day our Lord is referring to is a future day, the day of a thousand years; the millennial reign of Christ our Lord, Jesus. This is the first resurrection (Revelation 20:6). When a disciple—such as the apostles—suffer in this world of hatred by bearing the name of Jesus, then …your reward is great in heaven. So how are the apostles’ reward great in heaven? These men will sit on thrones, just take a moment to think about that … they’ll sit on thrones!

The scripture I’m about to present to you will reveal the nature of our great reward, and it’s such an encouragement as those of us suffer for the sake of Christ; that does not mean we inflict suffering upon ourselves by annoying people to death with what the world does not care to understand, and then call that “suffering”, because that is not suffering with Christ, that’s a desperate escape from putting in the labor of learning the Word of God and from experiencing the necessary discipline of our Father, and Lord, in heaven, by the Holy Spirit, while alive on earth. Now lets dive deep into the Word of God.

And Jesus said to them, “Truly I say to you, that you who have followed Me, in the regeneration when the Son of Man will sit on His glorious throne, you also shall sit upon twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. (Matthew 19:28)

The gospel according to the apostle Matthew records the prophetic Word of Christ to our consciences by reading …the regeneration when the Son of Man will sit on His glorious throne, you also shall sit upon twelve thrones… and so now, right now, is that time of regeneration (Titus 3:4-6) by grace through faith (Ephesians 2:8) as Jesus is already sitting on His glorious throne (Hebrews 12:1-2) mediating (Hebrews 8:6) from above through the portal [Promises/Providence]—like a ladder (John 1:51)—of His covenant down below to us here and now alive on earth awaiting with patience this great reward; the crown of the first resurrection (2 Timothy 4:7-8; Revelation 20:6) at His appearing; the millennial reign of Christ our Lord.

If you’re concerned that you are not among those of this reward. Then please listen to the Holy Spirit about the nature of that concern. I’m still exploring this revelation with prayer. Test everything presented with the Word of God by the Holy Spirit.

Until tomorrow…

Journal Entry 5

Jesus answered, It was neither that this man sinned, nor his parents; but it was so that the works of God might be displayed in him. We must carry out the works of Him who sent Me as long as it is day; night is coming, when no one can work. While I am in the world, I am the Light of the world.”

John 9:3-5

Father, thank you for the sovereignty of Christ our Lord. I pray that your readers will honor the Light that you are in this world as the people of salt and light you’ve graced them to be. Thank you for our gift; He is our Helper, the Spirit of Truth, the Holy Spirit, according to your Word (John 14:26; 16:7,13). Amen


Our featured image has evolved. In it, you’ll notice the green lines interconnecting the paths:

  • REWARD
  • SIN
  • BELIEF
  • UNBELIEF
  • DEATH

In my previous journal entry I’d expressed my concern about the nature of our green path of belief because belief, I believe, is the portal between the divine nature and human nature of which reveals the spiritual condition of a person for the sake of ministry to him or her. However, if the minister is not believing in Jesus Christ (The Minister) to be the Son of God sent of the Father for the proclamation of good news to the sinners’ remission of sin by grace through faith in Him [Jesus Christ] as salvation…then the portal to the divine that inspires that minister is being inspired by a different spirit, an evil spirit, not the Holy Spirit. And that might well be you or I if not checked, examined, and evaluated by the Word of God—which is what I mean to do by journaling the nature of my concern for discernment in following obedience (John 15:12-17).

So then what is the biblical nature of each path and their interconnected significance? For the sake of time, I may need to hold off until tomorrow, but as a note to self… Who is Jesus?—Why did I theme that? I don’t remember why I put that question in there, but whatever, I’m sure it will come back to me.

Journal Entry 4

As Jesus passed by, He saw a man who had been blind from birth. And His disciples asked Him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he would be born blind?”

John 9:1-2

Abba, thank you for the Light of your Truth. I pray those of us born blind in Adam since birth will read the saliva of spit and mud that is Jesus Christ, go wash, and come back seeing your Son. I pray those of us seeing (Church in Christ) will become blind faithful workers in honor of our Lord the Savior. Please strengthen us, bless us with courage, according to your will in Christ our Lord, Jesus. Amen.


In the featured image you’ll notice the many different arrows (“belief”, “reward”, “sin”, “unbelief”, and “death”) indicating directions, but I must clarify, they’re not directions; they’re paths. There is only one direction of which encompasses different paths of many sub-paths … paths of eternal significance leading in the direction of millennial judgement and eternal judgement (Hebrews 6:1-3, Revelation 20: 4-6, 11-15). And I pray you don’t run away at that, don’t think of judgement as what might easily be confused with a mythical tyrant god excited at the idea of punishment. That’s not what’s being communicated upon interpreting biblical judgement. And that is something I look forward to exploring together if the Lord permits.

The question I have that concerns me for every person (including myself) is the spiritual nature by which reveals the judgement of mine and your path’s—our path, individually and corporately—once the travel is concluded. For instance…

Some may look at the green path of belief and believe they’re on the right path, but what is the nature of that belief? If the nature of your belief is not in Jesus Christ for salvation from sin…then are you on the right path? Is your belief…Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your name, and in Your name cast out demons, and in Your name perform many miracles?’ Because if Jesus doesn’t know you, then the nature of your belief is in yourself, another person, or perhaps, providence, ect.; but it is not in Christ to be known by Him. D

All of these path’s are interconnected, and I’ll stop there for now, until tomorrow.

Journal Entry 3

So Jesus was saying to those Jews who had believed Him, “If you continue in My word, then you are truly My disciples; and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

John 8:31-32

Please keep me in your Word that the truth will set me free. I pray this also for my readers. Please keep us in your Word, Lord our God. Amen.

I’ve been reading through a lot of content lately—hence my absence—and plan on organizing what I’ve learned by their work to show my work to you, readers. It takes me back to school hearing the teacher conclude their lecture, “…and don’t forget to show your work.”

I’m so thankful for those before us that did their work and showed it for our learning. I’ve taken for granted so much, and I repent.

I do want to dig into the featured photo, eventually, because there is so much to extract from it. I can also foresee it evolving… one step at a time, Nathan.

I’ve missed writing like this, it’s therapeutic; keeps me engaged and connected. It also encourages consistency, which I’ve failed miserably at, and that reminds me. I’m still doing my Proverb’s devotionals in case anyone was curious.

Alright, lets keep this simple. Lord willing I’ll have another post at 6a tomorrow. Pray I’m consistent in my work.

Love you all like the sun loves the flower!

Journal Entry 2

I think I’ve discovered that I enjoy creating the featured photo more than the writing portion of my work… okay, maybe not more, but there is a unique joy I experience from that creativity.

I’m working on a bible study project called “New Foundation” that I hope to start publishing soon, but there is a problem. I get too excited. It’s not a problem that I get excited, but when I get too excited. So when I do, I’ll rest from the project; but then when I come back, realize it’s not ready. And that’s my problem; when is it ever ready?—I ask myself.

However, I believe God has granted me the grace to work while I work—and then some—by these Journal Entry posts. I feel it relieves the pressure to my emotional dilemma preventing my progress in the edification of incoming biblical projects such as the aforementioned.

Take a look at the featured photo and notice the figure at the bottom left. If you’re curious whether your speculation is accurate, it is. As a taste of what you’ll discover when I’ve published “New Foundation”, everyone is on a visibly different path, but invisibly, in one direction. So as I sit here as the one you see in the photo, am looking deep into the recesses of my spirit, asking myself, what do the paths’ mean? And am found deeply concerned for… everyone.

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.

Psalms 119:105

*Write you tomorrow— 0600 sharp!

Journal Entry – 1

I’m deeply encouraged by my brother Dallas’ 14 day Colossians Bible Study. It’s had such a tremendous impact on me (personally) throughout, but especially because of the impact it’s having and will continue to have on those whom I love. There is no greater… rather; what value can compare? From the small percentage of experience I have in this life will not compare to the eternal value of God’s Word. Thank you Lord, for Dallas, and all our family of the truly – faithful.

An Update 7-14-21

What happened? I blinked, and it’s been nearly 3 weeks since I’ve posted. Time is unrelenting. You might remember a few of my *cringing* ‘public journal’ posts with a draft and revised outline as you’ll find linked below:


//DRAFT//

  • Jesus Christ is my belief structure.
    1. What does that mean? (salvation).
      1. Human soul and God.
        1. Saved by grace through faith.
        2. How does faith work?
  • I love my wife—priority.
    1. She is the core/center of my responsibilities.
      1. I need structure.
        1. Public Journal/accountability
  • Job with hours to aid me on this trajectory.
    1. Not ideal, but blessed.
      1. I work nights and days.
      2. Best option at the moment.
        1. Aim for only nights if available.
        2. Or learn how to write, like, very good!
  • Psychology Professor—Jordan Peterson.
    1. Mentor/Maps of Meaning/(biblical skeptic?)
      1. I think Jordan’s strategy to understand ‘meaning’ is awesome!
  • My personality— understand and improve.
    1. 1 Peter 3:15 (but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence;)
      1. There is a hope in the personality of a believer.
        1. My personality is wild; I want to understand it.
  • Skill/s to master:
    1. Writing.
  • Goal/s…
    • Is there more than one?
      • Where is the sacred ground?
        • What is this going to do?
          • How will this be effective?
            • What is the sacrifice?
              • Will the practice, preach?
                • What does it mean?
                  • When is it time to plant?
  • The seed is to sanctify Christ as Lord in my heart.

//REVISED//

  • Jesus Christ is my belief structure.
    1. What does that mean? (salvation).
      1. Human soul and God.
        1. Saved by grace through faith.
        2. How does faith work?
  • I love my wife—priority.
    1. She is the core/center of my responsibilities.
      1. I need structure.
        1. Public Journal/accountability
  • Job with hours to aid me on this trajectory.
    1. Not ideal, but blessed.
      1. I work nights and days.
      2. Best option at the moment.
        1. Aim for only nights if available.
        2. Or learn how to write, like, very good!
  • Psychology Professor—Jordan Peterson.
    1. Mentor/Maps of Meaning/(biblical skeptic?)
      1. I think Jordan’s strategy to understand ‘meaning’ is awesome!
  • My personality— understand and improve.
    1. 1 Peter 3:15 (but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence;)
      1. There is a hope in the personality of a believer.
        1. My personality is wild; I want to understand it.
  • Skill/s to master:
    1. Writing.
    2. Videography.
  • Goal/s…
    • Is there more than one?
      • Where is the sacred ground?
        • What is this going to do?
          • How will this be effective?
            • What is the sacrifice?
              • Will the practice, preach?
                • What does it mean?
                  • When is it time to plant?
  • The seed is to sanctify Christ as Lord in my heart.

If the above outline is new to you, perfect, don’t worry about investigating it. I’ll give a brief background as to why they’re relevant.

The outline dates back to December of 2020 (approximately 7 months ago). I was prepping for the typical new years resolution (2021). Judging from my outline, that wasn’t all; there was obviously much more going on with me than setting goals. I had questions. And although I didn’t realize it at the time, the heart of my outline manifested as a kind of framework. A framework that might otherwise be described as an abstract place of reference, and a compass that’s navigated me to writing this post today. In reviewing the two outlines, there’s a very miniscule, but invaluable revision.

  • Skill/s to master:
    1. Writing.
  • Skill/s to master:
    1. Writing.
    2. Videography.

Now, of course—as the mastery of any developing value system requires the discipline—I have yet to master either of these arts, but the point of the revision in my outline is the fact that I wrote those specific skills of profession down with the intention to master them. The writing them down with intention is key. And while unpaid as a writer of this site, also unpaid as a content creator uploading YouTube videos on various “experimental” (most failed) channels I’d created over the past few years; the evidence of providence that this site means to represent gives me the privilege to tell you that my foot is now in the door as a professional video editor. But hold on! I’m just getting started! It took 5 months after writing out that revised outline before becoming a paid video editor. Much has happened over the course of 7 months since that outline.

OUTLINE

  • [12/16/20] Jesus Christ is my belief structure.
    1. [12/16/20] What does that mean? (Salvation).
    1. [12/16/20] Human soul and God.
    2. [7/14/21] What is the relationship between a person’s soul and God?
      1. [12/16/20] Saved by grace through faith.
      2. [7/14/21] Featured photo of this post update is an example of my work in developing frameworks that workout abstractions and understand axioms for righteous behavior.
  • [12/16/20] How does faith work?
    • [7/14/21] This outline is proving an example of how faith works.
  • [12/16/20] I love my wife—priority.
    1. [12/16/20] She is the core/center of my responsibilities.
    2. [7/14/21] This has not changed although a much needed constant reminder.
      1. [12/16/20] I need structure.
        1. [12/16/20] Public Journal/accountability
          • [7/14/21] This post marks a good direction in structure and accountability.
  • [12/16/20] Job with hours to aid me on this trajectory.
  • [7/14/21] Trajectory of James 5:19-20
    1. [12/16/20] Not ideal, but blessed.
      1. [12/16/20] I work nights and days.
        1. [12/16/20] Best option at the moment.
        2. [12/16/20] Aim for only nights if available.
          1. [7/14/21] I’m currently working a night shift!
        3. [12/16/20] Or learn how to write, like, very good!
          1. [7/14/21] Still a work in progress, but progressive nonetheless.
  • [12/16/20] Psychology Professor—Jordan Peterson.
    1. [12/16/20] Mentor/Maps of Meaning/(biblical skeptic?)
      1. [12/16/20] I think Jordan’s strategy to understand ‘meaning’ is awesome!
  • [12/16/20] My personality— understand and improve.
    • [7/14/21]
    • Agreeableness: 85
      1. Compassion: 96
      2. Politeness: 45
    • Conscientiousness: 35
      1. Industriousness: 44
      2. Orderliness: 30
    • Extraversion: 99
      1. Enthusiasm: 96
      2. Assertiveness: 98
    • Neuroticism: 92
      1. Withdrawal: 72
      2. Volatility: 97
    • Openness to Experience: 75
      1. Intellect: 28
      2. Openness: 95
  • [12/16/20] 1 Peter 3:15 (but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence;)
    1. [12/16/20] There is a hope in the personality of a believer.
    2. [7/14/21] See above…
      1. [12/16/20] My personality is wild; I want to understand it.
      2. [7/14/21] See above…
  • [12/16/20] Skill/s to master:
    1. [12/16/20] Writing.
      • [7/14/21] Still writing.
    2. [12/16/20] Videography.
      • [7/14/21] Continually developing my skill in the field – video editor.
  • [12/16/20] Goal/s…
    • [12/16/20] Is there more than one?
    • [7/14/21] Yes.
      • [12/16/20] Where is the sacred ground?
      • [7/14/21] It’s between the spoken and written Word given from the Spirit above to emerge from the soul beneath as truth.
        • [12/16/20] What is this going to do?
        • [7/14/21] …
          • [12/16/20] How will this be effective?
          • [7/14/21] Look from where you started to where you are, and analyze.
            • [12/16/20] What is the sacrifice?
              • [12/16/20] Will the practice, preach?
                • [12/16/20] What does it mean?
                  • [12/16/20] When is it time to plant?
  • [12/16/20] The seed is to sanctify Christ as Lord in my heart.

Have you outlined the heart of your vision and mission in life on this earth? If you haven’t, then let this post be a coach to you, and encourage you. Keep striving toward your goals with faith, and expect the providence of God.


RESOURCES


Relevant Posts

“…who takes away the sin of the world!”

Read Me First

“The next day he *saw Jesus coming to him and *said, “Behold, the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world!”—John 1:29

—(Elijah) John the Baptist
Matthew 17:11 And He answered and said, “Elijah is coming and will restore all things; 12 but I say to you that Elijah already came, and they did not recognize him, but did to him whatever they wished. So also the Son of Man is going to suffer at their hands.” 13 Then the disciples understood that He had spoken to them about John the Baptist. 

MY FOCUS

As I focus on these journal entry posts, I learn and understand more about myself and my deepest concern, the salvation of souls. Ever since I’ve heard and believed in the gospel, the question of whether someone is saved or not has always been at the core of my desire to understand. More on that in other posts.

In my previous post, which is a building block to this one, I wrote, “God didn’t create me to be good or evil, or even to be as in-between—under the curse of sin as a sinner while alive by the grace of God to exist separate from Him (And thank God for that!).” Which has compelled me to expound.

GOOD OR EVIL, OBSERVE:

  • Thinking about whether God created me to be good or evil?

I don’t think God created me to be good or evil, meaning there is a difference between ‘knowing good and evil‘ and ‘being good or evil‘. God saw all that He had made, then declared it ‘all‘ as … ‘very good‘; that didn’t mean that what He created innocent from the knowledge of good and evil to be limited by that innocence as programmed robots without risk, eating that fruit to have the knowledge of good and evil, of which existed altogether in harmony with the Lord God in the garden of Eden.

So sin existed in consequence of God warning Adam and Eve not to eat, or surely they would die (Genesis 2:17 but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you will surely die.”), and since Adam and Eve ate that fruit we all die because God means what He says; God is Holy and Just to execute the punishment deemed worthy of those attributes against His enemies. When mankind disobeyed God, we became enemies of God that reaps the consequences of that disobedience, and so therefore, we all suffer death.

1 Corinthians 15:22 For as in Adam all die, so also in Christ all will be made alive.

CREATED AS A SINNER?

I’m confident that God didn’t create me to be a sinner, which was what I meant by “in-between”—forever separated from God in the prison of death and Hades if it had-been that Adam ate from the tree of life (Genesis 3:22 Then the Lord God said, “Behold, the man has become like one of Us, knowing good and evil; and now, he might stretch out his hand, and take also from the tree of life, and eat, and live forever”—) to live forever in the consequence of our due penalty and present state of death; It would be miserable if this world of suffering … is without end, (Revelation 1:18 and the living One; and I was dead, and behold, I am alive forevermore, and I have the keys of death and of Hades.).

Thank God for Jesus taking away the sin of the world!

  • Thinking about what it means to be separated from God?

I know that I’m separated from God through knowledge gained by experience in this flesh and blood of sin and death under the grace of God (1 Corinthians 15:26 The last enemy that will be abolished is death.) by guilt that is incapable of inheriting the kingdom of God (1 Corinthians 15:50 Now I say this, brethren, that flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God; nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable.). Truth testifies to the death that I am dying as the last enemy to God yet to be abolished by the return of Jesus Christ (1 Thessalonians 4:15 For this we say to you by the word of the Lord, that we who are alive and remain until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep. 16 For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. 17 Then we who are alive and remain will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we shall always be with the Lord.).

SO AGAIN I SAY!

THANK GOD FOR HIS LAMB!

So all that to say that when Jesus took away the sin of the world at the cross as the Lamb of God, all entered into a new covenant of which saves us through faith.

The gift of God does not come without responsibility, that is to say, without repentance; repentance is experienced through much discipline by the Helper—the Holy Spirit (John 14:25 “These things I have spoken to you while abiding with you. 26 But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you. 27 Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.). (John 16:6 But because I have said these things to you, grief has filled your heart. 7 But I tell you the truth: it is to your advantage that I am leaving; for if I do not leave, the Helper will not come to you; but if I go, I will send Him to you. And He, when He comes, will convict the world regarding sin, and righteousness, and judgment: 9 regarding sin, because they do not believe in Me; 10 and regarding righteousness, because I am going to the Father and you no longer are going to see Me; 11 and regarding judgment, because the ruler of this world has been judged.).

Who is the ruler of this world?

I’ll leave that to build on in the next post.

Matthew 17:11 And He answered and said, “Elijah is coming and will restore all things; 12 but I say to you that Elijah already came, and they did not recognize him, but did to him whatever they wished. So also the Son of Man is going to suffer at their hands.” 13 Then the disciples understood that He had spoken to them about John the Baptist.

Lamb of God

INTRODUCTION

Hi my name is Nathan, and welcome to my blog if we don’t know each other and it’s your first time here. This past Friday – Sunday (April 2-4, 2021) was not only a memorial time for me personally, but for this world even if the world hates knowing it (John 7:7 The world cannot hate you, but it hates Me because I testify of it, that its deeds are evil.).

How this is personal to me is what you’ll read as each of these particular posts with the featured photo describes my experience with the Lamb of God. There is so much on my heart and mind that needs worked out; the freedom to write whenever throughout the day is such an awesome exercise for doing just that, working out my salvation with fear and trembling (Philippians 2:12 So then, my beloved, just as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your salvation with fear and trembling; 13 for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure.). And so what is my hope by this exercise?

My hope is that you, the reader, will discover new insights along with me about the Word of God by our common devotion to Jesus Christ our Lord. If you love the Lord, you’ve come to the “write” place, and I’m so excited to go through the trials of discipline with you as we discover more of our Savior together until we’re resurrected to life with Him by the glory, wisdom, and power, of God.

LAMB OF GOD

“The next day he *saw Jesus coming to him and *said, “Behold, the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world!”

—John 1:29

Now although the Bible doesn’t explicitly say from the book of Genesis that it was an innocent lamb slaughtered for the covering of Adam and Eve ( Genesis 3:21 The Lord God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife, and clothed them.); I believe it was an innocent lamb—by the fact that Jesus was identified as “the Lamb of God”—that clothed Adam and Eve, symbolizing the grace of God later to be revealed as Jesus of Nazareth who took away the sin of the world by being slaughtered on that cross (Matthew 20:18 “Behold, we are going up to Jerusalem; and the Son of Man will be delivered to the chief priests and scribes, and they will condemn Him to death, 19 and will hand Him over to the Gentiles to mock and scourge and crucify Him, and on the third day He will be raised up.”).

Why is the Lamb of God relevant to Adam and Eve?

The reason I believe the Lamb of God is relevant to Adam and Eve is because of the plan and process in which God accomplished to save us from our curse that eternally separates us from God, having been held captive to the rogue nature of a good serpent which manifests as … sin. I say “good serpent” to mean what God said when He created all things, and saw all things to be very good—including the crafty serpent in which He made (Genesis 3:1 Now the serpent was more crafty than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said to the woman, “Indeed, has God said, ‘You shall not eat from any tree of the garden’?). Which then begs the question…

If God is good, and if God is Love, how was it possible for an eternally good creature, created by an eternally loving God, turn from it’s own created nature as good, to be evil by deceiving Eve?

The answer, discovered with faith in Jesus Christ, is learned by the experience of spiritual discipline, but found in the book of Ezekiel (28:14 “You were the anointed cherub who covers, And I placed you there. You were on the holy mountain of God; You walked in the midst of the stones of fire. 15 “You were blameless in your ways From the day you were created Until unrighteousness was found in you.). Unless created beings were created to be robots of self-awareness, it doesn’t make sense that I would have the choice to be evil or good.

Therefore, I know that I wasn’t born as a created robot of self-awareness by the fact that I have the knowledge of good and evil; I can do either good or evil, but the choice comes with a risk. God didn’t create me to be good or evil, or even to be as in-between—under the curse of sin as a sinner while alive by the grace of God to exist separate from Him (And thank God for that!). So by the Lamb (grace) of God, I have the freedom to be good or evil at will – by the knowledge of both – but again, not without risk. According to this verse Genesis 3:22 Then the Lord God said, “Behold, the man has become like one of Us, knowing good and evil; and now, he might stretch out his hand, and take also from the tree of life, and eat, and live forever”—; I can either be good, or be evil, as both of these archetypes are evident in my soul to breathe both influences.

By archetypes I mean Jesus Christ and Satan; Jesus Christ is good, and Satan is evil, both of which are alive in my life as the knowledge of the truth bears witness to the condition of my soul; truth is recognized by my awareness of the curse in me through Adam as a sinner dying in sin, having sinned against the Word of God from the very beginning in Adam.

All human flesh and blood of Adam and Eve since the very beginning does not inherit the kingdom of God—hence the Lamb of God. I have more to build on from here, soon…

#HEBEROSEN!

Good morning, it’s 8:00 on the 4th of April in Dallas Tx, but 8 hours away in Jerusalem, Israel… it’s 4:00 in the afternoon! We’re waking up way behind schedule! Everyone on social media is like,

“HE IS RISEN!!!”

While the Jews in Israel *shaking heads* saying, “Americans…” “God have mercy.” Jesus is at the right hand of power … *tapping watch* … “Is this thing broken? I thought I rose hours ago?” Jesus already rose, and early that day nearly 2000 years ago, so why not we consider changing the American language of our culture, and say,

He be ROSEN!”

See now that! That has a “ring” to it! He be rosen up in dis house, you feel me! Now let me just correct the gospel real quick, Matthew 28:6 He is not here, for [He be rosen up in dis house], just as He said. Come, see the place where He was lying. There! Perfect!

WE ARE FREE!!!

I mean how exciting is it to proclaim to the world our freedom from sin! Come take a look see! Matthew 28:7 And go quickly and tell His disciples that [HE BE ROSEN] from the dead; and behold, He is going ahead of you to Galilee. There you will see Him; behold, I have told you.”

SO YO!

WE HAVE THE VICTORY!

I mean Jesus gave us the victory over sin and death through the provision of a sustainable belief structure and system! How awesome is that???!!! We are no longer chained to sin that condemns us to the wrath of God unless we’ve denied the gift of our faith through Jesus Christ!


1 Corinthians 15:56 The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the Law; 57 but thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. 58 Therefore, my beloved brothers and sisters, be firm, immovable, always excelling in the work of the Lord, knowing that your labor is not in vain in the Lord. (bold/italics/underline | mine)


So since Jesus be rosen in my heart, my hope is secure as my faith produces the qualities of His attributes while I die to myself for the sake of following Jesus Christ by the truth of His gospel—repentance unto eternal life!

THAT BETTER GET YOU FIRED UP!

Man do I hope that the world will hear and believe this good news, even at the prophetic words that reveal a truth difficult to bear—not all will receive, although all will hear to bow at the truth, and yet—my hope remains even at the knowledge of the truth that reveals the end before its beginning. I recognize with growing awareness that glows a very severe and fatal warning to this gift of my salvation shared with followers of the WAY, power with which words identify the place where the unbelieving soul remains consumed by condemnation … Hell.

Am I the only one that experiences the measure and weight of such words with power to shift the conscience from the perspective of victory to a perspective of grief at the thought of loss by a people choosing their denial by faith supplied to all for salvation? No… surely not. My friend and brother of the faith Draoun can tell you all about grief! That brother has been such a tremendous encouragement to me; he understands grief at a very different level, and has helped me understand the necessary process of grieving for healing. This pain doesn’t end in our flesh, but here comes more good news!

Revelation 21:3 And I heard a loud voice from the throne, saying, “Behold, the tabernacle of God is among the people, and He will dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself will be among them, 4 and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away.” (bold/italics/underline | mine)

Here we go!

AN EMOTIONAL WAVE!

Let the wave of grief run its course as it crashes into its boundary limit just as God declared to Job!

Job 38:
“Or who enclosed the sea with doors
When, bursting forth, it went out from the womb;
When I made a cloud its garment
And thick darkness its swaddling band,
10 And I placed boundaries on it
And set a bolt and doors,
11 And I said, ‘Thus far you shall come, but no farther;
And here shall your proud waves stop’?

Bear in mind the glory of God by His grace and peace through faith in Jesus Christ our Lord!

WE BE ROSEN!

When Jesus Christ ascended into glory at the right hand of God, He brought us with Him according to faith in Him by the promise of His Word—eternal life. Therefore I pray my heart, mind, soul, and strength, keep the commandment to believe in Him for as long as He sustains me to serve our living God! Amen.

Just some journal writing, hope you experience more grace and peace in the knowledge of God and of Jesus, our Lord.

From thoughts to literature, and the AD 2021 passover

Ever since Winter Storm Uri, my blog writing has slowed down rather drastically—as you might have noticed since February—although that’s not ‘all‘ the reason. I’ve been experiencing a dramatic shift … an edification, that once begun is not undone, of which has caused me pause and thus, here we are: I love how Thaddeus, a stone cutter and follower of Jesus the Nazarene, (played by Giavani Cairo in The Chosen season 1 episode 5 series) describes the purification jars as Jesus works a miracle of changing water into wine.

“Once you make that first cut into the stone, it can’t be undone. It sets in motion a series of choices, what used to be a shapeless block of limestone or granite begins’ its long journey of transformation, and it will never be the same.”

—Thaddeus (The Chosen S1:E5)

That best describes what I’ve been experiencing recently while, conversing with friends and family, investigating, praying, studying and memorizing—Scripture! I’ve been deeply moved to record and share at a more personal level with the T4P audience, and so, much like that first cut into the stone setting in motion a series of choices, is exactly what this post means to do. The miracle of Jesus changing water into wine is what God does with each of us as we believe in the Son of God. We are living miracles undergoing transformation by faith in what Jesus did on the cross some 2000 years ago; He was at rest silent in a tomb where nobody saw or heard the Word, the ears and eyes of Israel and Rome were deaf and blind until tomorrow morning in Jerusalem.

ARE YOU READY?!

NATHAN’S JOURNAL 2021 — Winter Storm Uri | VI

I’ve missed you people! Or well I’ve missed the meditative prayerful thoughts of you people when writing! There is a time for everything the Preacher says, and it was time for my writing to be on hold during last week’s winter storm “Uri” for the care of my family. But we’re okay! We’re alive … sort of!

I’ve had a little longer than a week to think about some things, ‘thinking’ can be quite dangerous if not spiritually healthy, and by healthy, I mean, trusting in the Holy Spirit of God to guide, even and especially when nothing makes sense: Like how does – “The Electric Reliability Council of Texas (ERCOT) manages scheduling on an electric grid carrying 90 percent of Texas’ load.” – resolve the issue of people freezing to death if the math forecasts dead cold temperatures upon us (said playfully to mean a very serious problem)? Not that I’m complaining, necessarily, because my faith is in Christ my Lord and Savior while being Texas proud, but being without power intermittently and for longer than 24hrs in freezing temperatures does cause pause, not to mention caring for someone sick—in a COVID stigmatized nation—to “help” our situation. So … needless to say; I’ve been thinking … “time to go off grid?!”

I did actually think that though, to go off grid, and even brainstormed with Laura (my wife) on how to go about doing that while camped out in our living room with my mother-in-law to try and stay warm. We had candles lit all around us like we’re performing some sort of witch craft or something—”you should’ve seen it! We made my mother-in-law levitate off the couch in subzero temperatures and everything! It was awesome!” (I’m definitely getting in trouble for that joke). But while freezing to death, decided to reach out to every Christian Texan on the cost of going off grid as a way of protest … unfortunately … it would ultimately mean war. That’s me confessing how my thoughts can take shape to form dangerous ideas in the wake of difficult circumstances if not governed by the Holy Spirit of God.

front yard

Anyway, apart from uneducated thoughts, my Christian brothers and sisters did take great care of us while in the midst of this Uri storm. I’m eternally grateful for Christian community! Going on 24+ hrs with no power, a Christian family of close Christian friends invited us into their warm home until our power was restored and remained on. They even took us in at the risk of one of us having COVID.

No one should deny the magnificent beauty through a costly storm as the language of it’s existence declares the scientific presence of God.

neighborhood “park”

This storm called life is not over, and thank God for that! The experience of being alive should not be taken for granted, nor used to deny it’s Author. God is with us no matter what storm we are going through, but will the person reading this trust in the testimony of that truth? Man, I hope so! Jesus died, was buried, and rose on the third day taking away the sin of the world, defeating death! The Word of God is declaring His coming judgement, and if you died today … are you ready? I’m excited to write again, thank You Lord! I’ll leave you with this scripture to think about:

John 16:7 But I tell you the truth, it is to your advantage that I go away; for if I do not go away, the Helper will not come to you; but if I go, I will send Him to you. 8 And He, when He comes, will convict the world concerning sin and righteousness and judgment; 9 concerning sin, because they do not believe in Me; 10 and concerning righteousness, because I go to the Father and you no longer see Me; 11 and concerning judgment, because the ruler of this world has been judged.

“Truth without love is ice cold.”

Nathan Dooley

Ecclesiastes 3

Nathan’s Public Journal | I

Monday, 12/7/2020

Here I sit, cameras in view, the time for me to be off duty is fast approaching. It’s nearly 06:00 (military time) coming off of a 12hr deep night shift during the weekend. My occupation is as a level 2 Private Security Officer and my work schedule is not ideal, but it’s currently the closest to my preference considering the options; this schedule fits my focus at this duration of my life. That focus is … well, we’ll get to that, but right now I’m still getting over this cringe.

I didn’t realize just how, hmmm … damaged I was, until re-reading some of my material of old. I can see where my mind would get stuck in the trauma of my past; a lot of my first posts I’d published nearly 3 years ago are written in a language of which feels, irreconcilable. I think, needless to say, I’m thankful for the grace—to be ever learning through undeveloped skills—of inexperience; the mistakes are endless, and that’s frustrating (I learn hands-on). However, there is a story in my mess waiting to be written, just not yet. Alright—time to head home.

So… now I hope, is as good-a-time as any to welcome you to my journal. If you’ve followed along with me (I know those of you who have) until now, you know this about me. I’ve been thinking about this journal idea for too long now (like yesterday—that’s a joke); writing happens to be very therapeutic for me, so uh… thank you, Therapist, I guess. This idea is much-much more than a therapy session you get to sit in on to hear all about my life’s drama. It will be an empirical psychology, only it’s written to be watched through the lens of intuition and imagination that writing/reading ignites!

Psychology—according to wordnik—at its core; the study of the human soul. And there is where I’m going to learn how my salvation is alive! I don’t know about you, but I want to understand my soul. And more than that, I want to understand the relationship between salvation of the human soul and God. I want to learn about what my belief structure means; I found someone in the field of psychology, a mentor. I’m exercising (like working out in the gym or fitness center) the weight of the gospel in my conscience. So I thought, “Well, what if my ‘T4P’ people want to keep a watchful eye on this progress and quite possibly, discover something of their own by this as well?” A big part of this idea goes out to Dallas Fluegel (check em out on YouTube) because I really like how he has structured—is structuring—himself by his videos, and want to apply that to my life.

Tuesday, 12/8/2020

What if you could understand your personality?

Function the way that you do?

Feel the way that you feel?

Does that not sound absolutely terrifying, it’s so awesome! Anyway, there are reasons I behave the way I do as soon as I wake-up into this world of causality that provides insight into who Nathan is and why he is, the way he is. I want to tap into that meaning of myself, so… here it goes. *Let’s make this a page turner.