Tag Archives: Christian ministry

When I First Read The Gospel | 2

You know, thinking back on it, I think I was baptized 4 times. But the point is I’d gone through the appropriate steps to be certified “Christian”. I remember making enough sense of the gospel to wonder “what’s the point of my education” if this life is meant to end for another to begin; it was more important for me to understand life after death than high school, but the reality of this life hits pretty hard when gravity throws a hook to the face a few times.

Next thing I know I’m well on my way in life with a good job working to get a “B” license at a waste water treatment plant in Wichita Fall Tx hoping to have a family of my own. I was ready baby, lets do it! At least, that was the appearance. The truth was, I wasn’t well on my way, issues within my personal life dealing with family consumed me. I was really ready for two things, death and taxes, okay not taxes, but was definitely ready to bounce up out of this life because no miracle of salvation happens for me. I didn’t experience the gift of power that would liberate me from sin and transform my life. I just got confused by what was expected of me by people who weren’t even practicing what they preached!

One thing did not change…my curiosity about the gospel of Jesus Christ. Somehow I knew it wasn’t this book’s fault for all the bad that’s happened, so one day in my early 20ies living in a duplex apartment with my step-brother, read through the gospels for myself and won’t forget the “ahhhh” moments as I read. But here is the thing, I’d already gone through what technically makes me “Christian”. Why was I now experiencing these “ahhhh” moments?

Oh just wait, this gets good!

These “ahhhh” moments reflected my heart ready to receive revelations for life change like seeds planted in fertile soil ready to germinate. But guess what, the testing of my faith began and it was ugly. There was opportunity after opportunity to experience so many different kinds of pleasures in the name of christianity because I didn’t understand the birth of my faith. It’s like, like a baby not understanding why he or she is screaming until milk shuts em the hell up [don’t tell me you hadn’t thought it you sinner] (humor recalibrated). But I didn’t have anyone to give me milk, so due to misunderstanding am ready to exit this life time and time again. Malnourished faith left me vulnerable to sin and desire for exiting life questioning my salvation.

While the testing of my faith is not over and am eating meat with my milk now, have the environment needed to grow and understand my service in this life. My service is you. You need to understand your salvation in Jesus Christ because if you don’t believe in God’s plan for salvation, you’ll find yourself ashamed that you didn’t listen nor seek after your own salvation given in believing the gospel of Jesus Christ. Do you believe in a life guards ability to save a person drowning? Do you have respect for life guards on duty prepared to save everyone willing to be saved? Then have respect for God by giving Him your full attention in reading the gospel of Jesus Christ  because He has saved you already if you’ll believe with faith.

I Don’t Follow Jesus

I Don’t Follow Jesus


“What!? No.” I know what you’re thinking, but I’m not trolling you. And remember, even though I don’t follow Jesus … keep loving people like He did and treat them as you want to be treated. Don’t try and scroll down to see what my aim is here. Does it surprise you? I mean…

I think John L. Cooper said it best—

“More and more of our outspoken leaders or influencers who were once “faces” of the faith are falling away. And at the same time they are being very vocal and bold about it.” (link)

And it only makes sense according to the Christian Post—

“Back in the 1930s, only 5% of Americans did not identify with any religion. In 1990 that number had risen to 8%, a modest increase after more than half a century.

But these last years have brought a dramatic change. By 2008, the number of Americans not identifying with any religion had risen to 12%, and by 2012, it had risen to 20%, with the number among millennials around 30%.” (link)

So this should not come as a surprise to you if it does. Especially if you’ve read how dark my previous post was. I mean, come on. I’ve been in the pits of unquenchable fire and suffering. I guess now the question is whether I truly EVER followed after Jesus? Some might think that my believing was in vain and only wanted something to gain. That I NEVER truly believed.

I would disagree and counter you misunderstand the enlightenment of your own faith or have not been enlightened to the truth of the gospel altogether. Just because you read that I don’t follow after Jesus does not mean that I wasn’t enlightened by the truth of the gospel, see I still know the truth and that is what should make this statement alarming.

The real question is—

Can the person turned away from their faith in Christ re-enter the Christian faith?

Sense we are talking about me because I’m selfish. The answer to that question for me is “no” because in my case I’ve confessed to taste the heavenly gift that made me a partaker of the Holy Spirit. So it is impossible for me to be renewed again to repentance since I again crucify to myself the Son of God and put Him to open shame. Don’t believe me, check out Hebrews chapter 6 in your Bible.

It is the Holy Spirit through the inspired words of the Bible that speak with authority … I’m just a messenger.

That is what happened to Judas Iscariot. Judas held onto his thievery at heart, did not confess this sin. To do this leaves the “believer” (by association) in this case, Judas Iscariot, vulnerable to Satan’s influence (John 12:4-6) and ultimate possession. This is why it is so important for professing Christians to not sell their soul for the cost of their sin not confessed.


38 John said to Him, “Teacher, we saw someone casting out demons in Your name, and we tried to prevent him because he was not following us.” 39 But Jesus said, “Do not hinder him, for there is no one who will perform a miracle in My name, and be able soon afterward to speak evil of Me. 40 For he who is not against us is for us. 41 For whoever gives you a cup of water to drink because of your name as followers of Christ, truly I say to you, he will not lose his reward. (Mark 9)

49 John answered and said, “Master, we saw someone casting out demons in Your name; and we tried to prevent him because he does not follow along with us.” 50 But Jesus said to him, “Do not hinder him; for he who is not against you is ]for you.” (Luke 9)


I’ll confess that I used this title to especially peak the interest of those who thought they knew me to catch them like a fish. Because it’s the kind of friend I am, it’s what I do, that’s my humor and getting a rise out of my friends is quite fun, I admit. Not with the intention of destruction of course, then there would be an issue.

I wasn’t lying about not following Jesus, but I do follow after Jesus with all my heart, soul, strength, and mind. So brothers and sisters in the faith, don’t hinder me just because I’m not following after the style of gospel in you. Don’t hinder me just because you think there are enough christian resources out there for me to get plugged into one without having to startup a recourse of my own. Don’t hinder me…

In Love.

Nathan Dooley